Welcome to Wittenberg High: Where your business is known by everyone else, your ex-boyfriend is dating your sorority sister, and you can’t seem to escape your Saturday night mistake, mostly because they’re in your 10:20 class every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
The metaphor of Wittenberg being a high school is one that many Wittenberg students seem to be well aware of and even reference in conversation to each other.
“I called Wittenberg a high school last night,” said senior Jamie Rezny. “It’s the perfect way to describe this place.”
But what is it that makes Wittenberg feel so much like a high school? Students say everything from the small class sizes, to the large amount of gossip make them feel like they’re back in the twelfth grade. One of the major issues connecting Wittenberg to a high school are the requirements that are put forth here, specifically those related to attendance.
“Attendance policies should be abolished,” said senior Jeff Lee. “You are in college and should be able to decide whether you need to attend a class or not.”
Besides the requirements to attend classes, students feel Wittenberg is similar to a high school in relation to the smallness of campus, which seems to generate cliques and groups that make for drama.
“Witt is such a small campus so everyone hears everything,” explains junior Katie Wenger.
With the smallness of campus comes the generation of gossip and rumors. Wittenberg students agree on this issue, saying that your business is easily picked up by everyone else. The main issue that Witt students seem to love talking about are those centered on relationships; everything from breakups to fraternity formal dates seem to get Wittenberg students buzzing.
“People love to assume things,” said Lee. “Especially things about hookups.”
The rumors that spread about hookups on campus are one of the most widespread, according to Wittenberg students. Some students believe the reason for this falsified image of people is a social networking site that, at least at Wittenberg, is checked more frequently than the university website.
“Everyone has an image of someone based on Facebook,” said sophomore Paige Pellegrino. Junior Christy Gorman adds “People are really into gossiping about people they’ve never met.”
And when it comes to relationships, Witt students had mixed reactions about the Wittenberg dating pool. When asked if ex’s become off limits to friends, some were quick to say yes, bringing up “man law”. Others remain a bit more open, saying small school, small amount of singles.
“It seems at Witt that people are recycled constantly,” said Gorman. “It’s because of how small it is.” An anonymous male senior added that a friend dating an ex can be accepted. “I don’t really get caught up in that because, odds are, I’ve hooked up with someone’s ex-girlfriend myself.” But on the reverse side, some believe the smallness of Wittenberg is no excuse. “It doesn’t matter the school I go to,” said junior Katie Bauer. “There would still be drama if my friend dated my ex boyfriend.”
Despite the many problems Wittenberg has relating to a high school environment, students seemed unable to come up with a solution to the issues.
“I don’t really think Witt can become less high school-like,” said Wenger. “We’re so small, so it’s bound to happen no matter what.”
Since Wittenberg has no plans to abolish attendance policies, ban Facebook, or enroll more students, Wittenberg students are advised to ride their remaining time out as best as they can before finally escaping into reality.
(Kristin Komar / email@example.com)